#i was considering tagging this with other things too but I'm not going to

[velvetvexations]

I guess Plaidos is doing that thing where she unblocks me to reblog me again lol.

Accusing me of pretending to be a trans woman is in fact misgendering me. I am a trans woman. I provably have a voice that can only belong to a person AMAB or someone who's tried very hard over a long period of time to masculinize their voice, so if I'm not a 'TMA' person, you must be necessarily be accusing me of being a man, although it would not be any better if you were saying I was any other kinna non-trans woman either, because it's still misgendering to say a trans woman is faking being a trans woman regardless.

You're misgendering a trans woman when you say I'm not a trans woman. You literally said me claiming to be a trans woman is the same as a conservative man making an attack helicopter joke. You can apologize for that at your leisure.

Extremely conceited. You come up on my blog fairly infrequently, but you have over fifteen times the followers I do and what you say has reverberations in trans discourse, so sometimes I get anons letting me know what new hornet's nest you've kicked off. I don't look at your blog because it makes my skin physically crawl. The fact that you're an Actually Popular Trans Woman on Tumblr, unlike me, means that you're going to get talked about occasionally because every time you say some dumb shit your gaggle of idiots is ready to enthusiastically vomit it at the other minority groups you call slurs.

Sincerely, get the fuck over it, you're either a prominant transfeminist literary analysist or you aren't.

It's literally a content warning, because you're a hateful and offensive person, but it's wild I should even have to defend that since 'transfeminists' will tag posts hating on me on a regular basis for no particular reason.

If you actually do go through that tag, you'll see that I tend to only ever talk about you in response to people bringing you up first, or in the case of you misgendering me, you talking about me first. The only real exception is that I made two posts about the Dropout discourse you blatantly started for attention, which was (a) still brought to me by anons since I'd not have known you were responsible for that otherwise and (b) a special interest of mine I was really fucking pissed off that you were fucking up with the bullshit that special interest was an escape from.

I'm not sending anyone to do anything, moron.

Your vanity is not charming. I've talked about you lately in direct response to you talking about and misgendering me. You are discussing me too dummy.

I don't think you should be transmisogynistically harassed, but I'm absolutely fucking not responsible for someone with fifteen times the followers I have getting backlash to things like defending a 4chan slur for non-binary people. Like, no, actually, someone taking issue with that is not on me, and considering what you think counts as transmisogyny, I'm not really sure I even buy your characterization of said backlash, especially if they're "directly referencing" anything I say.

Completely unsupported by your behavior! Do you remember when you were randomly like "if you're wondering what velvetvexations is up to, she's saying you can call trans women hysterical because they don't have uteruses" when that was not what I fucking said?

I've tried making the same "I'll never mention you if you don't mention me" offer to people who obsessively stalk my blog before, including people who I would never talk about anyway because they don't have nearly the same presence on this website. I've asked them to stop screenshotting my blog and lying about me and getting anons sent to my inbox as a result. I've reported them to Tumblr, who doesn't consider it harassment. Each time the people stalking me - which is what they were actually doing to me, unlike me occasionally commenting when someone tells me you've caused some new discourse - was laughed at and told I simply deserve it or bring it upon myself.

Once again, you position yourself as a serious transfeminist activist and you have the following to back it up. You have influence in the conversation around transfeminism and as a trans woman I have a right to talk about it. Tell people to stop parroting your every word, or better yet, entirely stop kicking at trans men and non-binary people literally every day. Like literally every day you do this, it's why I can't look at your blog because it fucking repulses me.

You don't do anything to help trans women. You don't care about trans women. You care about being cruel to other trans people and using that to prop up your own crumbling ego. I would love it if your opinions weren't unfortunately popular and constantly being widely disseminated among others, but like, they are, and it's fucking disastrous for everyone involved. I don't hate you more than any other dumbass radfem.

I've helped TERFs deradicalize and retransition. You will never in your life do a quarter of what I do for transfeminism. The most you will ever accomplish is being an aggressive contrarian who's too unoriginal to come up with headcanons that weren't popular with transmascs first and claiming it a win when you say they're too stupid and shallow to interpret art correctly.

[twig-tea]

GL Odds and Ends January 2025

I'm still trying to figure out what 2025 means for me in terms of where and how I spend my time, but one thing I am passionate about is making sure there is a record of GL media, so I'm going to try to prioritize keeping this up to at minimum monthly, though I might change up the format. Last one was end of December 2024. If you're interested in GL older than that, check out my GL rec list and my #gl recs tag for the other odds and ends posts. Series new to the roundup are marked with an asterisk*.

Currently airing (with thoughts up to 31 Jan):

Petrichor ep 9/10 (Thai, Saturdays, 10:00 AM ET, iQIYI) I've appreciated the struggle that Tul has gone through in terms of wanting to use her police powers to protect her family though that goes against her morals, and some of the procedural aspects I was grumbling about before have been explained by the plot. However, it still bothers me that she's not a very good detective. That being said, Engfa and Charlotte still have fantastic chemistry, and Na is having what seems like the time of his life.

*Us the series ep 2/12 (Thai, Saturdays, 8:00 AM ET, YouTube) I admit I think I have Chao Planoy fatigue. Age gap, both characters are lying to each other, there are abusive family members, and a guy who seems nice but I'm braced for a reveal about how he's actually awful. I'm feeling like I'm playing bingo. Honestly If someone gets hit by a car I might lose it. All my baggage aside, the pacing on this feels uneven and it doesn't feel like it has its feet yet.

*Call Me By No Name ep 4/8 (Japanese, Thursdays, 12:30 PM ET, GagaOOLala) Honestly I am not buying the romance between these two protagonists and I am finding them a little overwrought.

*Trunk Girl ep 1/? (Korean, possibly Thursdays, YouTube) This has just started, and the vibes are off. I am suspicious of the circumstances that led this runaway to stay with her friend, especially when she kissed her in her sleep (and I don't mean suspicious of sapphic feelings, those are already taken as given considering the genre).

*FirstLOVE ep 5/? (Korean, Mondays, YouTube) Toxic girlfriend gets replaced and then regrets letting her lover go. We'll see how this ends but this is another messy drama that feels pretty rough.

*I Am Devil ep 5/? (Thai, Saturdays, YouTube) Gonna be honest with y'all I watched ep1 and shelved the rest, it's a pulp in the style of high drama like Sastra and JPC below produce and just isn't my jam. If you're looking for high heat lakorn-style drama, give this a try.

[Note: Mate is still airing if you did not fast track, but since I did I've included it in the following section]

Recently Completed:

The Fragrance You inherit 8eps 25mins each (Japanese, 8 Nov 24-27 Dec 24, no official distribution but fansub on @isaksbestpillow's blog[thank you Siiri!] I loved this finale and wrote about it here. For those who don't want to click the link, in short this is not a romance but a really beautiful and sweet show about all kinds of interpersonal relationships.

Pluto 12eps 45 mins each (Thai, 19 Oct 24-04 Jan 25, YouTube) This series showcased the skills and chemistry of Namtan and Film, and had some of the most iconic product placement in a GL to date. The plot was messy but held together, and as much as I was unimpressed with their choices week to week, their choices made sense within the narrative (and genre) being told. I knew this one wasn't for me, but what it was doing, it did pretty well, and beautifully. The one real ding from me was the use of blindness as a metaphor that essentially got handwaved away; that and I think it was doing too much. But I am glad that before that, there was some great use of their platform to highlight the importance of universal design.

INTP 4eps 5 mins each (Korean, 27 Dec 24-22 Jan 25 YouTube) This is the latest short series from RedQ, who produced some of my favourite GL short series including More than or equal to 75 degrees C, and To the Ex who Hated Me. I said when this started that the setup of this one reminded me of Semantic Error if SangWoo realized he was attracted to JaeYoung at their first group assignment meeting, and I think that holds. These two fell for each other because they both care about the group project, and both protect each other. It's a bit short but I found it very sweet.

Mate, 12eps 50+ mins each (Thai, 26 Nov 24-28 Jan 25 fast-track or 4 Feb 25, WeTV (uncut version)) In the end this show remained a struggle for me. There were things it was doing that I really liked (the characters tried hard not to resort to noble idiocy, and when characters did resort to noble idiocy they were confronted with the consequences, for example), and things that I really did not, and there were parts that were really hard to watch and will haunt me. There are a lot of things I like about this show, so I don't want to discourage views. Just go into this one informed, and make the decision that's right for you.

*Adrenaline 4eps 15 mins each (Thai, 10 Jan-31 Jan 25, YouTube) This show is a cross between a travel ad and a lakorn. This is a major spoiler, but the main character has a secret condition where she forgets things that causes her to forget her first time with her girlfriend!? This show is so messy lol

Recent One-offs, Side Couples, etc.:

Fireworks of Yesteryear/When We Met has been made available on YouTube. A 35-minute Chinese GL that includes a makeout and as a result the production team have been working hard to get it in front of eyeballs. This is a moody piece with an open ending; there's an age gap too so YMMV (30s and 22).

GL microseries Your Name Engraved Herein (not to be confused with the BL feature film) has been subtitled by @douqi7s. Watch the original on Bilibili and enjoy the subs on YouTube. This one is also melancholy but it's some really tight storytelling in under 2 mins and manages to feel hopeful even though it's sad.

There is a lesbian side couple in Flirt Milk the series (airing now on iQIYI). This couple Noon and Praewa previously appeared as sides in Love Senior.

There is a new MV featuring a lesbian couple for the artist KnomJean on YouTube. This is one of those MVs that tells a story (TW for family violence) and after getting through the sad backstory, celebrates marriage equality in Thailand.

IdolFactory is re-running GAP the series on YouTube. If you've been putting off watching, now is a good time!

Speaking of re-runs, Yes Or No and the two sequel/spinoffs (Yes or No 2, and Yes or No 2.5) are all newly on GagaOOLala for streaming in some regions (I know for sure they're in North America, not sure about others)

Uranus2324 is starting to show up in particular places on the internet. I watched it and after all of the negative things I'd heard I actually liked it lol I'll see if I can write about it more this week

My suspected wlw sides in See Your Love ended up being implied only I was a little sad about this but at least I wasn't imagining the vibes.

Mom Ped Sawan is still airing but I still don't have a source for subs

Sastra film app YouTube channel has several short Cambodian GL series that come out weekly Honestly they are not to my taste but I don't like gatekeeping GL especially from smaller markets. I check in on these time to time and if there are any that I think are great I'll give them a shout-out

Ditto above with JPC media YouTube channel for Thai GL shorts if there are any that stand out to me I'll say so; that being said I haven't had time recently so if I've missed anything good let me know!

Starting soon:

Reverse With Me (sequel spinoff to Reverse 4 U), Thai, 5 Feb, iQIYI and Ch3+ app

Fragrance of the First Flower s2, Taiwanese, 18 February 2025, GagaOOLala ok this isn't that soon but I'm just so excited we're getting this second season after all!

As always, if I'm missing anything, please let me know!

[lightdancingwords]

Second Chances - Part Fifteen of ?

Pairings: Beau Arlen x Y/N Female reader Series Summary: A chance meeting in a grocery store brings a second chance for you and for Beau. The only thing standing in your way are your respective pasts... and a tiny little roadblock. Word Count: 5,172 Tags/Warnings: I actually don’t think there is any beyond SO. MUCH. FLUFF. And I guess babies and kids. Implied smut. A/N: Comments, Likes, Reblogs, Kind feedback are always highly appreciated. Please let me know if you want to be added to the tag list!

Note: I've several of you comment this, so here's official statement: I am likely to never end this story at this rate! I'm loving Beau and his relationship with Y/N! So until I'm burnt out on Beau or run out of ideas... consider this story ongoing! Additional Note: I feel bad. Emily somehow slipped my mind—probably because she’s in a whole other state, full grown, in her own life. But that made Beau look bad because she’s his firstborn, his daughter. So any errors in not mentioning her is on me and I apologize for that. I was called out on it and it’s a fair thing to do. I’ll try to incorporate her more often in his thoughts and story. Too late to edit this chapter but in the future I will be sure to include her.

Divider: credit to @sweetmelodygraphics

Chapter Fifteen: How To Love

The days following Caleb’s birth were a blur of healing, adjusting, and overwhelming gratitude. Y/N remained in the hospital under the careful watch of the doctors, recovering from both the accident and the emergency C-section. Beau barely left her side.

He took paternity leave without hesitation, knowing there was nowhere else he needed to be. The department could manage without him for a while—his family couldn’t. Jenny, though initially skeptical that he’d actually take time off, had practically forced him out the door with a smirk. “Don’t even think about checking your email, Sheriff.”

Meanwhile, Y/N’s mother had been taking care of Eliza, keeping the little girl busy and making sure she didn’t feel left out with all the excitement surrounding the new baby. But Beau knew Eliza missed them. Every time they video called, she would grab at the screen, squealing “Mama! Bo-Bo!” in delight before her little brows furrowed in confusion, clearly wondering why they weren’t coming home yet.

Finally, after five days in the hospital, Y/N was cleared to go home.

Beau wheeled her down the hospital hallway, his hand on her shoulder, the other carrying Caleb’s car seat. The tiny baby was bundled up snugly, sleeping peacefully, blissfully unaware of the life waiting for him outside those hospital walls.

Y/N sighed, tilting her head back slightly to look at Beau. “I’ve never been more ready to be home.”

Beau chuckled, squeezing her shoulder. “Darlin’, I don’t think I’ve ever been more ready to take you home.”

Outside, the truck was already waiting—Jenny had dropped it off for him earlier in the morning, making sure the car seat was properly installed. Beau helped Y/N into the passenger seat, buckling her in gently before carefully securing Caleb in the back. He checked the straps twice, his jaw tightening with focus.

Y/N smiled softly, watching him. “Beau, he’s not going anywhere.”

He exhaled, glancing at her. “I know. I just…” He hesitated before shaking his head with a faint smile. “Can’t help it.”

She reached out, squeezing his hand. “I know.”

With one last check, he climbed into the driver’s seat and started the engine, pulling out of the hospital lot and heading home.

Y/N’s mother was waiting on the porch when they arrived, Eliza in her arms. The moment the truck pulled up, Eliza’s little hands clapped excitedly, and she wiggled to get down.

Beau barely had time to unbuckle his seatbelt before Eliza was racing toward him, her tiny feet pattering against the wooden porch. “Bo-Bo!” she shrieked.

Beau laughed, scooping her up in one fluid motion. “Hey there, wolf-child,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to her curls. “Did you miss us?”

Eliza nodded enthusiastically, her little hands patting his face before she turned her big, curious eyes toward Y/N. “Mama?”

Y/N smiled, carefully stepping out of the truck. Beau was already there, offering his arm to steady her. She sighed happily as she stretched, then crouched down to Eliza’s level.

“Hi, my love,” Y/N said softly, reaching out for her.

Eliza practically leaped from Beau’s arms into Y/N’s, wrapping herself around her mother with surprising strength. Y/N winced slightly, but her laugh was full of joy as she held her daughter close. “Oh, I missed you so much, sweetheart.”

“Baby?” Eliza asked, looking around, her little nose scrunching in confusion.

Beau chuckled, moving to the truck to carefully unclip Caleb’s car seat. “Right here, kiddo.”

The second he lifted the car seat out, Eliza’s eyes widened. “Baby!” she gasped, her tiny hands clapping again.

Beau set the car seat down gently on the porch, kneeling beside it as Y/N shifted so Eliza could see.

“Meet your baby brother, Caleb,” Y/N murmured, her voice thick with emotion.

Eliza peered into the car seat, her face filled with fascination as she took in the tiny bundle inside. Caleb stirred slightly, his little mouth forming an ‘o’ as he stretched his fingers.

“Baby,” Eliza whispered reverently before glancing up at Beau and Y/N with a huge grin. “Mine?”

Beau let out a deep laugh, ruffling her curls. “Not just yours, wolf-child. Ours.”

Eliza nodded solemnly, as if accepting her important new role in the family.

Y/N’s mother chuckled softly. “Looks like you’ve got a little protector already.”

“Good,” Beau said, wrapping an arm around Y/N’s waist. “Caleb’s gonna need all the love he can get. And this family? We got plenty to give.”

Y/N sighed, leaning into him, her head resting against his chest. “Yeah. We do.”

Beau pressed a kiss to the top of her head, his grip tightening around her. For the first time in what felt like forever, everything was finally as it should be.

Home. Whole. Together.

And as he watched Eliza gently pat Caleb’s tiny hand, introducing herself in her own little way, Beau knew with absolute certainty—this was the life he had always wanted.

And he wasn’t letting go of it for anything.

Life with a newborn was both beautifully fulfilling and utterly exhausting.

Days blurred together in a mix of diaper changes, sleepless nights, and the soothing lull of Beau’s deep voice murmuring to Caleb in the early hours of the morning. The baby had a strong set of lungs, that was for sure. Every few hours, he let the entire house know he was awake, demanding food, warmth, and comfort with the kind of relentless determination that made Beau both admire and fear how much like his mother he already was.

Eliza was adjusting, too—curious, excited, and sometimes a little frustrated when her baby brother took up too much of her mama and Bo-Bo’s attention. But Beau made sure to keep their special time, setting aside moments where it was just the two of them, whether it was playing in the backyard or letting her “help” him cook breakfast in the mornings.

Y/N, meanwhile, was running on fumes, and Beau saw it.

She handled Caleb like a natural—her love infinite, her patience unwavering—but there was a heaviness in her, too. The exhaustion weighed on her shoulders, the sleepless nights dimming the light in her eyes. She barely had time for herself, always putting their children first. And Beau? He refused to let her forget that she wasn’t just a mother—she was his, too.

It was a particularly long night when they both found themselves collapsing into bed, barely able to keep their eyes open. Caleb had finally settled after what felt like hours of rocking, feeding, and humming softly to him. Eliza had gone to sleep without a fuss, blissfully unaware of the symphony of cries that had kept her parents up.

Beau groaned as he flopped onto the mattress, running a hand over his face. “I think my back’s gonna give out.”

Y/N chuckled, though it was weak, her body sinking into the bed beside him. “You and me both.”

He turned his head to look at her, taking in the sight of her—her hair a tangled mess, her body wrapped in one of his old T-shirts, her skin glowing despite her exhaustion. She was so damn beautiful, and she didn’t even realize it.

He reached out, brushing a stray strand of hair from her face. “You okay, darlin’?”

She let out a slow breath, rolling onto her side to face him. “Yeah,” she whispered. “Just tired.”

He nodded, understanding more than he could put into words. He scooted closer, wrapping an arm around her waist, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. “You’re incredible, Y/N,” he murmured. “You know that, right?”

She let out a tired laugh. “I don’t feel incredible.”

“You are,” he insisted, his voice steady. “The way you love our kids, the way you take care of everyone—hell, the way you still manage to laugh even after the longest days. I don’t know how you do it.”

Her gaze softened, her fingers tracing small patterns on his chest. “Because I love you. Because I love them. That’s how.”

Beau swallowed past the lump in his throat, his grip on her tightening. “I love you, too, darlin’. More than I got words for.”

She sighed into him, their bodies molding together as exhaustion pulled at them both. It wasn’t just about sleep—it was about feeling safe, wrapped in the warmth of each other, knowing that no matter how chaotic life got, this was home.

It was a couple of weeks later, in the quiet of the night, when things shifted between them again.

Y/N had just finished putting Caleb back down after a late feeding, her body moving on instinct now, even though she was half-asleep. She climbed back into bed with a soft sigh, stretching out beside Beau.

He turned, watching her in the dim glow of the nightlight from the hallway. “C’mere,” he murmured.

She hesitated, but he reached for her, pulling her into his arms.

“You don’t have to,” she whispered, her voice laced with uncertainty.

Beau frowned, leaning down to press a soft kiss to her temple. “Don’t have to what?”

She swallowed, shifting slightly in his embrace. “I know I don’t look the same,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. “I know I’m different now.”

Beau’s heart clenched. He pulled back slightly, just enough to look at her, really look at her. The soft curves of her body, the faint traces of exhaustion in her face, the quiet vulnerability in her eyes.

“Y/N,” he said, his voice gentle but firm, “you think I don’t want you?”

She looked away, her fingers gripping the edge of the blanket. “I just… I don’t feel like myself yet. And I don’t know when I will.”

Beau reached out, tipping her chin up so she had to meet his gaze. “You gave me a family,” he murmured. “You gave me Eliza. You gave me Caleb. You gave me a reason to come home every damn day. And I swear to you, there ain’t a single thing in this world that could make me love you less.”

Her eyes shimmered with unshed tears. “Beau…”

He kissed her then, slow and reverent, his lips moving against hers like he was rediscovering her, like he was reminding her of everything they had. His hands roamed gently, no rush, no urgency—just love, just worship.

“You’re still my Y/N,” he whispered against her lips. “You’re still the woman I fell in love with, the woman I’m gonna marry, the woman who drives me crazy in the best damn way.”

She let out a shaky breath, her fingers tangling in his hair. “I love you, Beau.”

“I love you more,” he murmured, kissing her again.

And as they melted into each other, the world outside faded. It didn’t matter that they were parents now, that their lives had changed, that exhaustion still clung to them.

All that mattered was this—Beau and Y/N, their love as fierce and unshakable as ever.

And as they lay together, wrapped in each other’s arms, Beau knew with absolute certainty that nothing—nothing—could ever come between them again.

The last few weeks had been the best of Beau’s life. Days spent holding his son, laughing with Eliza, stealing quiet moments with Y/N—they had settled into a rhythm, one built on love, exhaustion, and the small joys that came with having a newborn.

But now, his paternity leave was coming to an end, and Beau hated it.

He sat on the edge of the bed one evening, rubbing a hand down his face, his jaw set in a deep frown. Y/N was in bed beside him, their bedroom cast in soft, golden light from the bedside lamp. Caleb was already asleep in the bassinet beside their bed, Eliza down the hall in her own room, and the house was wrapped in a rare, peaceful quiet.

Y/N glanced up from where she had been running lotion over her arms, her eyes catching the tightness in his expression. “What’s wrong, cowboy?”

Beau sighed, running his hands through his hair. “Tomorrow,” he muttered, like the word itself left a bitter taste in his mouth.

Y/N tilted her head. “Tomorrow?”

Beau looked at her then, his green eyes filled with something vulnerable, something rare. “I gotta go back to work.”

Y/N softened, setting the bottle of lotion aside as she shifted closer to him. “Oh, Beau.”

He exhaled sharply, looking down at his hands. “I know I have to. I know the department needs me. But damn, Y/N… I don’t wanna go.”

She reached for his hand, intertwining their fingers. “I know.”

Beau swallowed hard, his jaw tensing. “Feels like I just got you back. Just got time with my boy. With Eliza. And now, I gotta leave for most of the day, every day, and—” He cut himself off, shaking his head. “What if I miss somethin’? What if I miss his first word? His first step? What if��”

Y/N squeezed his hand, stopping him mid-spiral. “Beau.”

He met her gaze, his breath unsteady.

She smiled, soft and knowing. “You are not missing anything. We are right here. Waiting for you every single day. We’re not going anywhere.”

Beau let out a slow breath, his shoulders slumping slightly. “I just love you so damn much,” he murmured. “All of you. And I hate the thought of leavin’ this.”

Y/N reached up, cupping his cheek, her thumb brushing lightly over the beard he had let grow in during his leave. “Beau Arlen,” she whispered, her voice thick with love, “do you know how much we love you?”

His breath caught, and she leaned closer, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

“You have taken care of us so well,” she murmured against his skin. “You are the best father, the best partner. And just because you have to go back to work doesn’t mean that changes. Doesn’t mean you stop being ours.”

Beau closed his eyes briefly, exhaling as she kissed his cheek next, then his jaw, then finally his lips—soft, lingering, full of reassurance.

“I love you, Y/N,” he whispered against her mouth.

“I love you more,” she breathed, pulling him down with her as they sank into the bed, their bodies molding together.

The house was quiet, the only sound the occasional soft coo from Caleb’s bassinet. Beau lay on his side, Y/N tucked close against him, his hand tracing slow, lazy circles over her hip. The earlier tension had melted away, replaced with something tender, something deeper.

Y/N rested her head against his chest, her fingers absently playing with the hem of his T-shirt. “You are so loved, Beau,” she whispered.

His fingers stilled for a moment before tightening around her waist. “Yeah?”

She lifted her head slightly, enough to meet his gaze in the dim light. “Yeah.”

His throat bobbed as he swallowed. “You sure?”

Y/N smiled, shifting so she was straddling his lap, her hands pressing against his chest. “I have never been more sure of anything in my life.”

Beau’s hands slid up her thighs, gripping her like she might disappear. “You always know exactly what I need to hear, don’t you?”

She leaned down, pressing a slow, lingering kiss to his lips. “Because I know you,” she whispered. “I know your heart. And I know that you are everything to us.”

Beau exhaled sharply, pulling her down into a deeper kiss, pouring every ounce of love, of gratitude, of devotion into it. His hands moved up her back, fingers mapping the shape of her, rediscovering every inch of her in the dim light.

Y/N pulled back just slightly, her breath warm against his lips. “We’ll be waiting for you every day, Beau. I promise.”

He cupped her face, his green eyes filled with nothing but love. “And I promise I’ll always come home to you.”

She smiled, resting her forehead against his. “Then I guess we have nothing to worry about.”

Beau chuckled, rolling them over so he hovered above her, pressing kisses along her jaw, down her neck, whispering between each one, “Damn right, we don’t.”

And as the night stretched on, wrapped in warmth and love, Beau knew—no matter where life took him, no matter how many hours he had to spend away, his heart would always belong here, in this home, with this woman.

And that was all he would ever need.

Life had finally settled into something steady, something warm. Caleb was growing fast, filling out with chubby cheeks and strong little legs that kicked with excitement whenever he saw his parents. Eliza had adjusted beautifully to being a big sister—sometimes a little bossy, sometimes a little jealous, but always full of love.

Beau had never been happier. His days at work were structured, his evenings filled with laughter and bedtime stories, and his nights spent wrapped around the love of his life.

Y/N, meanwhile, had thrown herself into planning their wedding. She had lists, swatches of fabric, guest counts—things that overwhelmed Beau but made her light up with joy. He let her take the lead, offering his opinions when needed, but mostly just soaking in the happiness she radiated whenever she talked about the future.

But even in all the joy, Beau noticed the way Y/N would sometimes grow quiet when she thought no one was watching. He noticed the way she avoided certain dresses when trying things on, the way she hesitated before letting him see her fully unclothed, as if she was waiting for him to notice something wrong.

And tonight, he caught her.

The house was still and quiet, the soft hum of the baby monitor the only sound filling the air. Caleb was sound asleep in his crib, Eliza curled up in her bed with her stuffed rabbit. Beau had just finished locking up for the night when he paused outside their bedroom door, catching sight of Y/N standing in front of the full-length mirror.

She was wearing only her slip, the dim glow of the bedside lamp casting gentle shadows over her skin. She poked lightly at her belly, smoothing her hands over the soft curves that hadn’t been there before pregnancy. Her expression was unreadable, her lips pressed into a faint frown as she traced the faint lines on her stomach.

Beau leaned against the doorframe, his heart tightening at the sight. He wasn’t sure how long he stood there, watching her, memorizing her—the way she bit her lip, the way her shoulders slumped slightly as she exhaled.

Then she caught him in the mirror’s reflection.

Her gaze lifted, meeting his, her body tensing slightly. “What are you looking at?” she asked, her voice hesitant.

Beau pushed off the doorframe, stepping closer, his green eyes never leaving hers. “Just thinkin’,” he said softly.

Y/N turned slightly, her brow furrowed. “About what?”

He stopped behind her, his hands sliding over her arms, wrapping her in his warmth as he rested his chin on her shoulder. “How damned lucky I am,” he murmured against her skin.

She let out a breathy laugh, but it lacked conviction. “Beau—”

“No,” he interrupted, tightening his grip around her, his voice gentle but firm. “Let me say this, Y/N.”

She swallowed hard, but she didn’t pull away.

Beau leaned down, pressing a slow, reverent kiss to the side of her neck before meeting her eyes in the mirror again. “You carried our babies here,” he whispered, sliding a hand over her stomach, his fingers splayed wide. “You gave me our family. And you think for one damn second that I’d ever see anything less than perfection?”

Her lower lip trembled slightly. “I just don’t feel like myself anymore,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. “I love them, I love what my body did, but… I look at myself, and I don’t know who I am.”

Beau turned her in his arms, his hands cradling her waist as he met her gaze, his green eyes filled with nothing but love. “Then let me remind you,” he murmured.

His lips found hers, slow and deliberate, his touch gentle but firm as his hands slid up her sides, memorizing every curve, every change. He kissed her like she was something sacred, something precious, something irreplaceable.

When they broke apart, he rested his forehead against hers, his breath warm against her lips. “I love you, Y/N,” he whispered. “Every single inch of you. Then, now, always.”

Her eyes shimmered with emotion, and she exhaled shakily. “Beau…”

He pressed another kiss to her forehead, then trailed soft kisses along her jaw, his hands never leaving her. “You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” he murmured against her skin. “And I will spend every day of my life makin’ sure you know it.”

Y/N let out a soft laugh, though this time, it was real. “You always know what to say, don’t you?”

He grinned, his fingers brushing over the curve of her hip. “Nah, darlin’. I just tell the truth.”

She sighed, melting into him, her arms wrapping around his neck. “I love you, Beau.”

He kissed her slow and deep, pouring every ounce of his love into her. “And I love you,” he whispered against her lips. “Always.”

And as they sank into the quiet of the night, wrapped in each other, Beau made good on his promise—to love her, to remind her, to make sure she never doubted just how perfect she was in his eyes.

Now and always.

Beau had spent the past few weeks planning the perfect evening for Y/N. He wanted to give her a night that wasn’t about the kids, wasn’t about exhaustion, wasn’t about adjusting to life as parents of two. No, tonight was about them—just the two of them, the love they had built, and the future he was ready to cement.

He had it all arranged—Y/N’s mother would be watching Eliza and Caleb overnight, giving them an evening free of responsibilities. The reservation was set at the finest restaurant in town, a place neither of them had taken the time to visit before. And in his pocket, tucked securely in a velvet box, was a ring—a ring that had once belonged to his mother, resized and polished, now meant for Y/N.

He planned to propose to her again—not because he thought she needed a third proposal, but because he did. Because the first time had been in a hospital room, after she’d told him she was pregnant. It had been emotional, sincere, perfect in its own way, but this time? This time, he wanted it to be something just for them.

He wanted her to feel cherished.

Y/N stepped out of their bedroom in a fitted emerald dress that took Beau’s breath away. The fabric hugged her curves in a way that had his fingers twitching to touch, and the way she smiled at him—nervous, flattered—made his heart thud in his chest.

“Damn, darlin’,” he murmured, his green eyes raking over her. “You tryin’ to kill me?”

She laughed, shaking her head. “I should be asking you that. A fancy dinner? A date? What’s gotten into you, Beau Arlen?”

He grinned, stepping forward to press a slow kiss to her lips before whispering, “Just want to spoil my girl.”

And spoil her, he did.

The restaurant was elegant, dimly lit with candles flickering on each table, the soft hum of a jazz band playing in the background. Beau pulled out her chair for her, ordered a bottle of wine, and made sure she didn’t lift a finger all night.

He watched her as they ate, admiring the way her face lit up when she tried the dishes, how she laughed easily when he cracked jokes, how she kept stealing glances at him like she was trying to figure out what exactly he was up to.

Halfway through the meal, she set her fork down, tilting her head at him. “Okay, cowboy. Out with it.”

He smirked, raising an eyebrow. “Out with what?”

“This,” she gestured vaguely around them. “The fancy dinner. The wine. The lingering stares. You’ve been romancing me all night, Beau. And not that I’m complaining, but…” Her voice softened, her eyes searching his. “Why all the effort?”

Beau’s heart swelled at the way she looked at him—like he was her whole world.

He reached across the table, taking her hand in his. “Because you deserve it,” he said simply. “Because I love you. Because I want to remind you just how damn lucky I am.”

Her lips parted slightly, emotion flickering in her gaze. “Beau…”

He stood then, reaching into his pocket. Y/N blinked, watching him in confusion as he moved around the table. Then, realization dawned as he slowly lowered himself onto one knee.

Her hand flew to her mouth, her breath catching. “Oh my God.”

Beau flipped open the velvet box, revealing the most stunning vintage ring—a delicate band with a diamond nestled in intricate filigree. It was timeless, classic, perfect.

“This ring belonged to my mama,” he said, his voice thick with emotion. “I had it resized, polished, made new again—because that’s what I want for us, darlin’. A fresh start, a lifetime together.”

Y/N let out a soft, choked laugh, her other hand clutching her chest as tears welled in her eyes.

“I asked you twice before,” Beau continued, his green eyes never leaving hers, “but I didn’t do it the way you deserved. And after everything we’ve been through, I wanted to do it right. So, Y/N…” He took a deep breath, his grip steady on the ring box. “Will you marry me?”

Y/N let out a half-laugh, half-sob, nodding frantically before she even found her words. “Yes,” she whispered, then louder, “Yes, Beau. Yes.”

A grin split across Beau’s face as he slid the ring onto her finger, his hands shaking slightly with relief. The moment the band was secure, Y/N launched herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck, kissing him fiercely as the restaurant erupted in soft applause.

He laughed against her lips, his hands firm around her waist as he held her close. “I love you, Y/N,” he murmured.

“I love you too,” she whispered, her voice full of joy, of love, of absolute certainty.

Beau kissed her again, deeply, fully, sealing the promise between them.

This was it.

Their forever was just beginning.

Beau wasn’t done spoiling Y/N. Not even close.

After their unforgettable dinner, he drove her to a luxury hotel in the heart of Big Sky, one of the finest in Montana. The moment Y/N saw where they were, she let out a surprised laugh, glancing over at him as he parked the truck.

“Beau Arlen,” she teased, raising an eyebrow. “Are you trying to seduce me?”

Beau smirked, turning off the engine. “That depends. Is it workin’?”

She bit her lip, pretending to think. “Hmm… jury’s still out.”

Beau leaned closer, his lips grazing her ear. “Well, darlin’, let’s see if I can win you over.”

With that, he stepped out of the truck, coming around to open her door like a true gentleman. He held her hand as they walked inside, checking them in under a reservation he had made weeks ago. When Y/N saw the suite he had booked—complete with a fireplace, a massive bed draped in silk sheets, and a grand marble bathroom—she turned to him with wide eyes.

“You really did go all out,” she whispered.

Beau shrugged, grinning. “You deserve it.”

She reached up, running her fingers along the edge of his jaw, her voice soft with love. “You are something else, Sheriff.”

He kissed her knuckles, his green eyes filled with adoration. “Come on, darlin’. Time to unwind.”

Beau had already thought of everything. A warm, luxurious bath was drawn in the grand soaking tub, bubbles and fragrant oils turning the water into something truly decadent. Y/N let out a slow, happy sigh as she sank into it, closing her eyes as the warmth enveloped her body.

Beau knelt beside the tub, rolling up his sleeves, his hands skimming lazily along the water’s surface as he watched her.

“You’re starin’,” Y/N murmured, her eyes still closed.

“Can’t help it,” he said, his voice thick with admiration. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

Her cheeks flushed, and she let out a soft laugh. “Smooth.”

Beau chuckled, dipping a washcloth into the water and slowly dragging it over her shoulder, down her arm. His touch was gentle, reverent. He washed her with slow, deliberate care, massaging her shoulders, kneading the knots from her back. Y/N melted under his hands, her body sinking deeper into relaxation with every stroke of his fingers.

“Beau,” she sighed, tilting her head against the edge of the tub. “If you keep this up, I might fall asleep on you.”

He smirked, pressing a kiss to her damp shoulder. “Not yet, darlin’. I’m not done spoilin’ you.”

After the bath, he wrapped her in the softest robe he could find, guiding her to the bed. He sat behind her, his strong hands working their way down her spine, massaging every inch of tension from her body.

Y/N let out a breathy moan, her head lolling forward. “You’re gonna ruin me.”

Beau chuckled, his lips ghosting over the shell of her ear. “That’s the plan.”

His hands roamed lower, kneading the small of her back, then down to her hips, tracing the curves he loved so much. As he turned her to face him, his eyes darkened, filled with something deeper than desire.

“Let me love you, Y/N,” he murmured.

She smiled lazily, stretching like a cat beneath him. “That’s how we ended up with Caleb, you know.”

Beau grinned, leaning down to kiss her neck. “No regrets.”

She laughed softly but quickly lost her breath as his lips traveled lower, his hands following, mapping every inch of her body. He took his time, exploring her with slow, reverent touches, as if memorizing her all over again.

“You’re perfect,” he murmured against her skin.

Y/N shivered, running her fingers through his thick hair. “Beau…”

He worshipped her, loving her through the night with a tenderness that spoke volumes. He made sure she felt adored, cherished, his. Every touch, every kiss was a promise—a reminder that she was his whole world.

And as they lay tangled in the sheets, her body still humming from the love they had shared, Beau pulled her close, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

“I love you, Y/N,” he whispered, his voice hoarse but full of warmth.

She smiled sleepily, snuggling against him. “I love you too, Beau. So much.”

He held her close, breathing in the scent of her, feeling the steady rhythm of her heart against his. He had everything he had ever wanted—his woman, his family, his forever.

And he wasn’t letting go. Not ever.

Tag List: @spxideyver, @deadlymistletoe, @bitchykittenconnoisseur, @aarpfashionvictim, @stoneyggirl2

@foxyjwls007, @katastrophicmind, @globetrotter28, @deansimpalababy, @daisychaingirl

@nancymcl, @deans-baby-momma, @kickingitwithkirk, @kmc1989, @ozwriterchick

Want to be a part of this tag list or others? Comment here and I'll add you! And check out my other stories that are currently being written!

[29daffodils]

to plot or to not plot, that's the question

there's post under the tag that... really tickled my brain because i somewhat agree with it. but not entirely, considering i do still believe OP sounds... i dunno, something, while they are telling FK stans to “have some dignity”. so I'll just add to that, because i think fan interpretation and looking deep into a story is important, than say, just being fed all the info.

now let's start with saying i am a FKT stan and I'll be somewhat biased in my approach, but i will still try to keep this as neutral as possible.

that said, i do think jojo's writing needs improvement. a looooooot of improvement. the other day i was complaining to my friend @skyfish7 how jojo tends to use serious topics as plot devices and then does nothing with them. also the fact that he has a flair for drama and usually seems to include it in places to engage the viewers but he handles it poorly (boeing, I'm looking at you bitchass) or simply doesn't conclude them well (kant's phobia, bison's bdsm shtick, etc, i know we still have 2 eps left, don't kill me yet).

i do think OP was coming from a genuine place but also, i will take the time to defend jojo here too. because THK is not all trash. joong and dunk's characters are visibly seen to be falling in love, whereas first and khaotung's are more subtle.

i know what OP means by saying that it's still hard to believe that kant is in love with bison. because part of me feels that too. i believe a lot of it is because we do not see any detailed development where it's needed or it is skipped over in favour for more drama. like i said, jojo tends to gravitate towards big impactful scenes but he does not lay out the finer details. i am choosing to think that's just his writing style and not him just being a terrible writer. as my girl sky said, it leaves something to the viewer's imagination. and yes, she's right and i agree. spoon feeding every bit of a story is lame and boring, but sometime you do need to add little details where they are needed.

if you've already read my post about how THK seems to be losing steam, you might know what I'm talking about.

I'm very much convinced that this could have done well with a binge watch or if it were in movie format. but imo there's too many things going on with the focus distributed disproportionately among them, which in turn, i think, kinda makes the character development take backseat.

but let me add something about bikant because OP seems to be under the impression that they are simply trash.

jojo tends to make the falling in love subtle. at least for his FK characters. in bikant's case, they were both already smitten with each other from the first meeting. especially kant. he was head over heels for bison and it was very visible. it was deliberately shown. so when he does start the mission of getting dirt on him, the most visible emotion we see from kant is guilt. nothing else but guilt. and that is because it's already established he likes bison as a person. kant's character is written as someone who compartmentalizes things so even when he does find out bison's a hitman and there's proof (we see him staring horrified at the corkboard in their house) he quickly dismisses it. we repeatedly see style telling us that kant is smitten with bison. why? because kant doesn't have the mental capacity to think about romance right now, so it's style who tells the viewers his friend is wrapped around bison's little finger. the time when we finally actually see him do anything remotely truthful is ep#7 — the bowling alley and northern lights scene. kant has successfully gathered all the info he can and now he knows he might lose bison. so this one night he actually goes and lets himself love truthfully. he does all the things he would have done after that first meeting with bison. and then when bison gets shot, that's when he realises what he actually wants. the hospital scene is an important one because it cements the fact that kant cares, kant is in love, but his brain hasn't caught up to the feeling yet the idea is there, the proof is there, but he hasn't had the reprieve to sit and think and let that love marinate well. it's why even when kant says that he loves bison, it's difficult for us to believe. it's difficult for bison to believe. remember, we are viewing the beach scene from bison's pov and he ultimately asks, “you are not fooling me again, are you?” and that is the question from the viewers as well.

“you are not fooling us again, are you, kant?”

so all bison and we can do is take kant at face value and choose to believe him. that's all there is to it.

bison on the other hand? bro has been whipped since the first night. he is a hopeless romantic. he is an abused child hungering for love stuck in an adult's body. bison has been infatuated with kant from the get go, but he has also been suspicious and we have seen that suspicion slowly drop and build back up again time and time. but the moment bison actually spends all of ep#7 with kant and says, “i feel like my life is about to change”, that's him falling in love. that's him acknowledging that he is gone for good and he is finally choosing to believe kant despite the previous shady sus things he's done. bison had chosen to believe in him despite fadel warning him time and time again, and that's why the beach scene hits so hard. he is simply a fool in love. he is naive. he is the younger brother who doesn't know better. he just wanted to love, he loved and he got duped into being loved back (we all know that wasn't the case, but, bison POV like i said).

now, coming back to the point i was trying to make : do i think an extra tidbit of scene where kant's thought process was expanded on could have been better? yes.. maybe. but as a writer who likes to keep her readers interpreting and guessing, i choose to forgive jojo this time (as well). like i said, maybe this is just how he tends to write and honestly that's fine. every writer has a set of audience they are aiming for and i think there are plenty who enjoy his work (i do too, i just wish he'd tone down on the super big things suddenly being thrown in out of nowhere and then doing nothing with it).

and as far as sandray goes, boy do i have news for OP because ray is a classic example of a mentally ill abused child who is now an alcoholic and sand is a surrogate husband/caregiver growing up in poverty who puts himself last. that's their story. that's the story jojo wanted to tell, and i will rant about ray and sand and forgiveness (because OP thinks he is an asshole, so i want to make a point) but.... in a different post.

for now, this is it. i hope you forgive and understand kant. bro is trying and so are we.

[thehollowwriter]

All of my non-twst ocs are old ones I've had for a while. I have considered making them into twst ocs too as an au or smt... Let's see what we have:

☆My first ever queer couple consisting of a butch bi ginger (Cassandra- though she prefers being called Casey- Russou) and a lesbian ex gymnast (CatherineHarris). Both are assassins (or spies? A weird mix of the two idk little me was cooking and the food was a mystery). Casey's a sniper who's tough as hell and will fight you in the alleyway, and Catherine is as elegant and charming as can be and you'll be quite seduced until poison gets slipped into your drink.

☆Twin brother (Alekai Snow) and sister (Chromespear Snow. I'm working on the name change, okay) from another planet. They're part of a species I called the Nocturi. Well, half Nocturi and half Solarian. Alekai's a doctor who was forcibly declawed and needs tech to help his fingers move bc it caused nerve damage, and Chromespear's a blacksmith, and she needed more development tbh but she was iconic

☆The boss of my two assassins who's just an incredibly superfluous, cartoony supervillain simply known as "The Director" (nobody knows his name and neither does he 💀) He's shipped with an irl friend's oc who's a mafia boss and they're both incredibly evil together

☆The powerful mage and general (Ephemeris Vikatte) who's got a whole *gestures* thing going on with Alekai. The two of them are basically just "enemies" (in a petty way) to friends to lovers. He's a bit of a dumbass tbh XD himbo energy

☆The guy who in retrospect is low-key a beta Silas. (Kurai Dusk) He's traumatised and tired but he loves his wifey to the ends of the earth. He's also the second in command to the Empress who I'm considering making a Queen instead because little Quinn did not understand what that title meant lmao

☆Another doctor guy (Assegai Copper) but he has anxiety and mommy issues and powerful magic and is trying his best. He's a small-town GP (like REALLY small-town. Like a village) and he accidentally saved an assassin named Crimson (unrelated to my other two assassins) who he has a situationship with now XD (I actually started writing a story for them when I was like... 12/13. Rewrite? 👀)

☆My beloved Empress/Queen (Achlys) who's the last of her species, and whose species in question I actually wanted to be a mimicry of the Nocturi. She has immensely powerful magic and control of shadows and the darkness (was known as "the Shadow Empress" Can you tell this was my edgy phase yet)

☆My mad scientist (Dr. Maddeline Kruger) who "killed" Catherine. Casey's been hunting Dr. Kruger down ever since, but she doesn't know Catherine is still alive. I'm probably gonna change this storyline there was a lot wrong in retrospect 💀

Okay I'm tired now but tadaaaa should I make twst versions of them

Tagging: @distant-velleity @br3adtoasty @rainesol @theleechyskrunkly @jovieinramshackle

@galaxies-and-gore @cyanide-latte @cynthinesia @officialdaydreamer00

@krenenbaker @offorestsongs @kitwasnothere @elenauaurs @boopshoops

@inotonline @1dont-really-know @kazumify @minteasketches

@elysia-nsimp

@skrimpyskimpy @casp1an-sea @offorestsongs @tixdixl

@poisoned-pearls @the-trinket-witch

@ramshacklerumble @ghostiidasponk @thegoldencontracts @sillyslipperybananapeel @cloudcountry

@skriblee-ksk @twstinginthewind @lumdays @theolivetree123 @natsukishinomiyaswife

@authoruio @jewelulu @raguiras @moonyasnow @skibidibabygirl

@quartztwst @yuizenihaswriten @oya-oya-okay @kirans-wonderland @coffinkissez

@idikeis @s-t-y-x @minutewondertwist @random-twst-and-oc-stuff

[yayroos]

i might be poking a bear best left to the archives of my other blog. but. it still hurts me so much that the thing i caught the most hate for across my various adventures of this fucking website was the time i, an aromantic asexual just coming to terms with what that meant for my life and future, dared to be hurt by John Watson in BBC Sherlock (which everyone still loved at the time) stating that a romantic relationship would improve Sherlock as a human being.

I got people sending me all the vile things the discourse could generate. I wasn't even primarily upset that they'd implied that Sherlock might not be aro/ace, that stung but i didn't really expect it to stick. I was upset that a character I liked and looked up to at the time was saying outright and with no wiggle room that being uninterested in romance was a fundamental flaw of someone's personhood.

I never watched another second of Sherlock after that. Never finished that show that up to then had meant so much to me. Because John said the things he said. And i went a ran to my room and made a sad and angry post on my blog all about asexuality and aromanticism and then for daring to be hurt by this i was subjected to all the violent rage tumblr could produce.

I wonder why i stayed on this god damn hellhole of a website. I really do.

[emmavakarian-theirin]

the way the music died at just the right moment made this so perfect

[mintjeru]

hypothetically speaking, these would be cute sticker designs ^^

open for better quality | no reposts

[dovalore]

evbo meets a little friend!

alright you already know the drill, time for a yap session

his eyes are just rectangles (oblongs?) here since i wanted to incorporate that specific aspect of evbo's skin into the design. it also kinda serves to make him look more... animalistic? he's a bird, so i really like this look for him

the song i listened to while designing him was to the sky

another inspiration i had for this design was meteion since she's probably one of my favourite designs in ffxiv

he's somewhat based off a conure/hummingbird! their colours are similar at least and hummingbirds have incredible control over their flight so yeah, that's him

but if you asked me to pick between those two for like, an actual bird form, he'd be a hummingbird. again, because they're super agile but this is what i imagine what he sounds like when he snores

related to that: all of his colours were made warmer on purpose, really colourful birds usually come from tropical regions so this was a way to reflect that a little bit

no boots, just netherite scales on his legs and hands (claw? talons?) because i thought it would be cool. so these things can't be taken off, they're part of his body

the knee pads can though, those pop on and off like magnets

he can't actually fly, but he can glide and it helps with adjusting the trajectory of his jumps and it negates the need for water bucket clutches if he times his wingbeats right (so i guess this makes it closer to an elytra? it might be interesting if he figured out how to use fireworks)

instead of having tail feathers coming off his body, i thought it would be a cooler visual to have his headband become his tail. so... that's' another thing he can't take off his body now!

the things he can take off are his hoodie and pants

pants are worn as usual, but the hoodie has a giant hole in the back for him to slip into so he doesn't have to pull things over his wings

speaking of his tail feathers, they're based off peacock feathers since he's kind of a show of lmao, the 'eyes' on them are a nod to him being the parkour god since i did something similar for acg's design with his head wing, evbo's markings are pretty much just that. markings, so he can't see through them or anything

not visible because it's being covered up, his chest is fluffy! i just think it would be cute and i'll take literally any excuse to add more fluff to a character because it brings me that much joy

also this is the first iteration i had of bird evbo's design, look at this little guy

the green highlights were cool here, but they kinda just ended up blending in with the rest of his hoodie/body so i decided not to do that

i made him fuzzier in the full piece too because i can

his ears were changed to be wings since these ones were too similar to my previous evbo design

headband tail feathers have been part of the vision since the start, but these ones here were pretty much just slapped on without too much thought about what they actually look like

now i don't usually share unfinished work on its own but these two have been sitting in my drafts for weeks now so... here's another little guy!

can you tell that i really enjoy making designs of him?

anyway, since summit evbo's still a draft at this point, i won't say much about him since he'll have his own post eventually

but i do want to say that i consider him and bird evbo as a duo of sorts since they're kinda opposites in terms of design

[themintman]

I am filled with HATE and SORROW y'all know how like Nurm is my favourite character my number 1 guy out of any piexe of media ever I love him dearly which sucks cause he's pretty unpopular but whatever whatever. N I'm like "man I really want to see some new Nurm content but everything I find I've either seen before or I created ☹️" and then I. I go on tiktok and I KEEP seeing edits that start with a clip with Nurm in them and then haha surprise it's actually a Petra edit!! Cause it's ALWAYS PETRA GOD DAMN IT and I love her. I love Petra so much. She is a fabulous character but ohm y god I am tweaking. I genuinely started crying y'all I am not sane nor normal. I'm so normal about him. Oh my good god I am going insane I am 💥💥💥💥

[riddlerosehearts]

i found ur blog recently after becoming incredibly infatuated with twst but specifically idia shroud (my friends said i act like him to an uncanny level and they were absolutely right...) and i love your vilidia posts dearly. ok that's it thank u

OMG that's so awesome, welcome to the twst fandom and congrats on having such fantastic taste in characters and ships lol!! i adore vilidia (obviously, if my whole vilidia tag is any indication) but i haven't posted about them in so long, i hope you don't mind if i use your ask as an excuse to share some silly little headcanons that i don't believe i've posted before:

so i think that when vil was like, 10 or so, his dad tried to encourage his love of potion-making by getting him one of those candy chemistry kits. the ones that come in super cute colorful boxes and teach you how to make things like exploding pop rocks and glow-in-the-dark gummies while explaining the science behind it. (here's a picture of basically the exact thing i'm thinking of.) but vil, poor sweet little vil who'd already let the brutality of the entertainment industry make him believe that he needed to be absolutely perfect, just rolled his eyes and said he was too old for that stuff and that all of that candy wouldn't be good for him anyway. he never once touched the kit, even though part of him probably did really want to.

and i also think that at some point, after he and idia had started dating, idia bought one of those same kits online and just barely mustered up the courage to ask vil if he'd like to join him and ortho in making some of the candy. he claimed the entire thing was ortho's idea, but vil could tell that idia really wanted them to do this together and he decided it'd be okay to indulge his boyfriend just once. as he actually made the candy he realized that although it obviously didn't teach him a single thing he didn't already know, it was still a lot of fun and he wished he hadn't rejected things like that as a kid.

also, speaking of chemistry, there's a voice line in-game where idia implies that he is not good at it. so while i think he and vil would be fascinated by each other's different fields of scientific interest and would love talking about it together i also think that one day idia just very overdramatically goes like: "omg i'm doing soooooo bad in my chemistry classes... if only some super smart and kind and very attractive person would help me out..."

and vil responds by telling idia that he most certainly does not share his younger brother's talent as an actor. but he agrees to help anyway and then they have cute study dates.

idia's habit of starting to excitedly infodump about his interests only to suddenly get embarrassed and stop persists for a while into his relationship with vil but every single time it happens, vil encourages idia to keep going. he often says things like "oh, are you done already? that's a shame, i was so looking forward to hearing more about sora's journey to save kairi". it takes a long time but eventually idia gets to a point where he's so comfortable around vil that he doesn't feel embarrassed anymore.

[arkiwii]

very sad still see the saria/silence divorce headcanon still going around

have you ever tried to consider that they never dated before lone trail because it would be unrealistic with the timeline and the events and also because it would be overshadowing the actual truth of why they couldn't get along

[iamyounicorn]

there is a story trying to form in my head that sounds like a perfect plot for one of those yaois you read once and never find again, which sucks because I am so bad at drawing comics bigger than one silly page

[boxwinebaddie]

uncle neen!!! welcome back omg i was so sad to see u disappear </3 hyh !!! i had a question i asked last time but i was wondering since ur rewriting ur fics, are u planning on posting them on tumblr? or on ao3? pls be kind to urself too<33

good MORNING, lovie!!!!~ <3 c':

( or whatever time it is, where you are at the moment! )

i'm very excited to announce that you are my very FIRST new ask message on my brand new blog!

( teri is my first follower; ly ter. <33 o//3//o )

***long overdue UN ramble-bramble under the cut. xx

i /do/ miss my six hundred bajillion ask memes and am mourning the loss of all my online creations and great joys as a deranged southpark fanfiction author and the legacy i built with my tiny, gay weird hands

( i will go into it another time, but i had a very, very frightening bipolar episode surrounding my blog and my role on here as a writer, friend and mentor to you all, deleted all my things in a horrible panic, was able to recover them...but in the -- what i hope is the *very last* -- after shock of my episode...i got very scared, very sad and deleted both my dearly treasured and beloved, beautifully cult followed by many of you and other ghosts of sp style fanatics past ao3 account**

**( with peppermint on it at 13k likes which...oh my god, please be gentle with me, that was a very, very hard blow and rough realization for me and i am sorry to everyone who loved that fanfiction and wanted to go back and read it for posperity and personal comfort...i miss her too; rest in peace, pep, my first born. my sweet girl. </3 )

...and most tragically of all, i deleted my tumblr blog, with over one hundred pages of carefully curated content surrounding my sp aus, your lovely, insightful and thoughtful questions and inquiries, also typed with your tiny, weird gay hands answered, in turn, with mine, torched the ev. of those memories in the final blast and lost my window into your world through that medium...

...which is literally heartbreaking to me, because more than even my silly fanfictions or my blog, what i loved to do, was talk to all of you and read your wonderful messages each day and remind myself of why i should be here and continue to do what i do. </333 :'''c

BUT! my darlings, as ravenstan would say, 'it's always darkest before crimson dawn', for the very first time in several weeks ( which, i fear, and i was, full of fear and horrible self loathing/dread every waking and nightmarish moment ), last night, i cried for a very, very, very, long time, held myself together in the broken places -- told myself and the girl i was that i loved her and i was going to take care of us and be brave -- and broke the fever ( a little off key like jersey kyle, but very lovely nonetheless; love you tone deaf king. x my sboyf. )

today, i woke up this morning and slept...PEACEFULLY and woke up PERFECTLY HAPPY AND RESTED...

AND SMILED. QUITE. WIDE!!!!~ :D

and that is a baby step, but it is a step in the right direction and also almost wanted to make me weep like a baby again because i literally have not felt happy or like i do not hate myself for like, i shit you not, over like 15-20 days...it was frightening and fucking horrible! SLAY!

nevertheless ( or the most, finally ) i am excited to welcome in a new era/year of change on my blog and within myself; which is an era of peppermint flavored 'hope i'm healing' in a delicious rem(ember) font.

unfortunately, because i nuked my ao3 account, i do not currently one atm, but am in the process of recovering it.

( i'm not condoning any kind of rude/uncivilized behavior bc people are allowed to do anything they want -- but i'd really like to get my user back and would appreciate it a lot if no one used it to create another ao3 account just because it would be confusing for my readers and disheartening to me to not be boxwinebaddie anymore. )

until then, i will be writing/drafting rem(ember) in my messy google docs, am storyboarding everything to the best of my ability ( which is not perfect, but nothing is -- except stan and kyle to each other -- but god loves a trier, which is why he hates me: i prefer hell where it's drier -- that way my girlfail guylinea will not run. xx )

KALE SEITAN! ;)

posting little snippets of it on here for all of you, probably put it here on my tumblr and post it up to ao3 if i can regain my account/one in general ( i am a little worried that because of how long it's been, the loss of all my followers and, what i assume, is a decreased public or tiktok generated interest in sp, it will do poorly; rip </3 )

-- but the point is...that i want to start doing stuff for myself now. and not because i think i should or create unnecessary stress/sadness surrounding my strength or weakness as a writer or person ( or like, beat the living shit out of myself every single day anymore )...

...so i am writing it slowly, carefully, synthesizing all the info i gathered from over a year of answering your questions ( which helped me develop my sp au styles and their worlds into the lovely, seemingly breathing paper machslayed things they are now ), am going to write the fanfiction i always/wanted/ to write ( i’ve always wanted to rewrite RM, but was so busy and overwhelmed with my blog/my irl stuff that i couldn't )

and i'm calling it...

<3

p.s. ( i love you ): i am going to give my grandmother a copy of the first chapter of peppermint for christmas because i wanted to do something special/sentimental for her and secretly push the gay middle school style agenda ( she is actually very woke and thought my uncle might be gay for a while when he was younger, haha xx ), but i want to give them different names, so that on the off chance it gets passed off to my mom, my dad or manages to travel by world of mouth ( my grandma has a tendency to gab, but i love her a lot ) that it can't specifically be traced back to my dead ao3 or my blog.

so if any one has any ideas for silly interesting names i could give my sons, names for other characters or south park in gen. hit me up! <33

thank you for your interest in my work -- and in me, in general. i love you all dearly, i hope you heal ( i know you will ) and smile, pendejos because got a lot coming up on that crimson dawn and a lot of crazy shit coming down on that *jersey i won't say i'm in luh megara vc*

~SCHARLET sLUt~

cheers! mazel! ;) xx

-uncle nina, in her healing era <3

[fusionsprunt]

Hunter what the FUCK-

.

[longagoitwastuesday]

I am liking Jujutsu Kaisen, way more than I imagined I would, but I foresee it will let me down and it's keeping me from enjoying this as much as I could haha

I think the characters and dynamics are well set, and I think many of them have an incredibly good and deep potential, but I would be willing to bet they'll not get a proper development, enough for them to really hit. A well assembled set of gears is not enough to make the movement go, you have to wind the clockwork.

I think Gojo and Megumi have a fascinating and very complex dynamic, but I doubt it will be given the time and care that imo it needs to actually work. And it is going well enough for now! One could see the intimacy between them was deeper than the one Gojo had with, say, Yuji and Nobara ever since the very first few episodes despite the fact Fushiguro too was a first year. But the pieces forming what they have are extremely complex, and it just wouldn't be realistic if it doesn't show, even if in a not showing way, or if it doesn't have consequences or implications.

It's one of those dynamics that shape one's life, the way one regards the world, the way one establishes or not relationships with other people. It's one of those dynamics that could be full of fondness, gratitude, resentment, admiration, trust, and that imply intimacy, the good kind or the bad, even if in just the knowledge of someone who's been a constant through your life. It could, and would, imply a myriad of feelings, and probably in such a mix it could imply contradictory feelings too. Even the nothingness would weight, even the nothingness would be significant and meaningful.

Gojo took Megumi and his sister under his wing, the son of a man who murdered him, because of both selfish and selfless reasons. Megumi looks like Toji. What does Gojo feel about this? How does Gojo deal with this? How does Gojo go about taking care of Megumi? Would he walk him to school? Make him breakfast? Celebrate his birthdays making him blow candles? Did he take him to the zoo? Does the relationship between them feel professional or is it something more? Gojo appreciates his students, but is Megumi to him just another student? When Gojo faces Sukuna in Megumi's body, did he see the kid he raised, or does he just see Sukuna in one of his students' body? Did he have one faint wavering instant? And how does Megumi feel about this? Is he resentful of him? Resentful of the situation? Of the selfishness behind his actions? Does he feel like a pawn? Is he grateful? Does he resent feeling grateful? Would he rather not? Does he love Gojo? Does he feel nothing about him other than what he could feel about a teacher that sort of annoys him but knows he's reliable in his strength? Does he think it unfair, cruel or unfeeling that Gojo is close, closer perhaps, with Yuuji or Yuta, considering their story? When Sukuna slices Gojo in two, does the remnants of Megumi's soul tremble?

And not just Megumi and Gojo. Yuuji and Nanami, Gojo and Nanami, Yuuji and Fushiguro, Nobara and the boys, or Nobara and Maki, Todo and Yuuji or Yuta, Gojo and Yuta, Megumi and his sister. Gojo and Geto, even! If the pieces are well set, the dynamics are intriguing, interesting, and have potential to be deep, but then the characters have like two plot relevant scenes that punch you hard, but little more, it's not nearly enough. Especially not nearly enough for the enormity that is shonen dynamics and situations. And the potential existing at all, and then not delivering, makes it all the more frustrating when you're left with something mediocre that could have been so good.

The development of dynamics through not only a few plot relevant gut wrenching moving scenes, but also the smallness of life, is important. The friend who recommended this to me said that those things were just unnecessary filler, but I disagree. I think there's a big difference between a large amount of anime-only filler episodes whose existence is based on the fact they had run out of manga chapters to animate, and moments of quietness. The low stakes character-driven moments of quietness can be so telling and so insightful, and they are so satisfactory when brought back later in higher stakes situations. My friend teased me there was no scene of Gojo making breakfast to Megumi, that it would be an idiotic idea, but it would be so telling. How he makes breakfast, what they eat, if he tries hard or if it's all mechanised, if they have personal bowls or if they use whatever, if he just buys them some pastry on the way to school, if the way they have breakfast changes through the years, or if he doesn't make them breakfast at all! All that would be very insightful on their dynamic and its evolution. All that would give a glimpse on how they regard each other and why, even in the present. All that could become meaningful in tense situations and high stakes scenes.

These moments also let the plot breath; if a lot is happening all the time, if every character is always experiencing trauma after trauma, the entire story is so emotionally draining that at some point you don't even care all that much. Besides, these nothing moments or low stakes plot arcs, besides deepening and developing dynamics, also let some in-world time pass, which would make the intimacy and bond between characters more believable imo; between Yuuji eating Sukuna's finger and their last confrontation in December how much time has passed? A few months? Am I truly to believe these characters are so everything to each other in only a few months?

Without some smallness, some repetition, some daily life, some low stakes not plot-centric development, the dynamics don't hit, they don't truly feel fleshed out, and dynamics as complex as the ones Megumi and Gojo have, or as supposedly meaningful as the one Megumi has with Yuuji or his sister, should be fleshed out if they're going to exist at all. Otherwise they'd risk making the writing feel awkward and fake. Besides, if the dynamics felt well fleshed out and realistic, they would shape the way the characters interact and act, and how they deal with situations, thus being plot relevant.

The shonen genre has so much happening all the time, the stakes are so high, the dynamics are so rooted in big events and the relationships carry enormous weight and implications. Yet they barely get developed, and it feels so stupid, so plain, the absence of something so important noticeable like a constant void, a shapeless nothingness present in every scene. It makes the characters feel like cardboard figures. Jujutsu Kaisen is already getting a better job than many, but I doubt it will do enough for what I've heard, and I fear I am bound to feel let down, and bound to feel unmoved.

After all, if not enough time and care has been given to develop a dynamic, I am not going to feel pressured by the high stakes; if not enough time and care has been given to develop the dynamic between Megumi and Yuuji, as good potential as it has I am bound to feel little for this last confrontation between Sukuna and Itadori, and his effort in getting Megumi back.